Not content with pulverised puppies in liquid form, they've now turned their hands to relatives!
As the Chinese had decided to up sticks and go on holiday, we had to make do with a fabulous Indian... but the menu!
Now, normally these places serve up naan bread, being a nice bit of unleavened bread or some such. Not to be mistaked for those liberators of Ragesh 3. However, naan do not appear on the menu no more.
Nor does Spoo, so that's alright then!
What DOES appear in it's place is a selection of Nans. Plain nan, peshwari nan, etc. Now, I know there's a massive problem, what with old gimmers eating up our pensions and being an inconvenience at rush hour and lunchtimes, but that's no excuse for foreign nationals to start grinding their bones to make their bread!
A nan is a granny, grandmother, granmama, nanna, etc - it's certainly distasteful to bung a clove of garlic up her tradesman's entrance and serve her up as a side accompanyment to a tandoori.
Of course, if it was a Nan of younger years, say one of them teenage pregnanciers whose teenage daughter is now preggers, and a Pretty, I wouldn't mind a bit of Minge* Massaala, but wrinkly gimmerquim - Eurgh!
On the plus side though, to show their integration into UK culture, they've ripped off The Fast Show, and serve up Motor Ponir - in English..
Cheesy Peas!
Brilliant!
* AND HOW COME MINGER RHYMES WITH LINGER, AND NOT GINGER? THAT CAUSED ME GREAT CONFUSION WHEN I FIRST CAME ACROSS THE WORD MINGING (OO-ER MISSUS!) - IT THOUGH IT WAS MINGE-ING, AS IN TUPPENCE LICKERY ACTIVITIES. ESPECIALLY WITH THAT IMAGE OF THE HAGGARD OLD CRONE WITH HER TONGUE ALL HANGING OUT...
