One of the best days of my life!
Ever!
No losers here. No nations. Only worthly athletes.
And George Osbourne getting a boo-ing for being such a cunt.
But honestly - an experience never to forget.
Running into ParalympicsGB in Starbucks.
Almost falling into Tasmin Grieg's crotch head first.
Seeing World Record after World Record broken before our eyes!
Seeing Britain and Ireland winning golds live.
Seeing winners receive their medals... and, oh, that Krestina Zhukova (Russian, Silver Medallist, F20 long jump)
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| ♥♥♥ Xym want ♥♥♥ |
Being in the stadium and being part of that crowd - there's just NOTHING like it!
Even if special Cheryl sat there looking special with that special expression.
And Paul. Oh, Paul. Paul who thinks Numan is God, John Foxx is God to Numan's God, and OMD are Gods to one and all thought it was more amazing than all three!
But not Go West.
Nothing is better than Go West.
Except coming down the motorway seeing signs for "Offroad Activity Areas".
Offroad Activity Areas?
Surely that's layby dogging sites, isn't it?
It's come to something when The Council are putting up signs to direct doggers so they can engage in their clandestine forestry "Offroad Activities" when they fancy a bit of motorway minge.
What is the worlds coming to?
Offroad Activity centre my best hat!
Wheelchair basketball.
Christ, we're shit at it!
Watching Canada - BOOM! Slam dunk the funk! UK - lob it a bit and watch it bounce out.
So, I reckon TeamGB should stick to what they know.
In the city yesterday, I walked past [somewhere] and saw something in the window. All bedecked in Union Flag livery. And whilst watching some more wheelchair antics, that item crept into my bonce and stuck there. Something properly British.
Sod "Wheelchair" Basketball - what we need is...
...wait for it...
...you ready for this...
... pom Pom POMMMMMMMMMMM!...
SPACE HOPPER BASKETBALL!
After all, they's quite similar to wheelchairs. Except you have to bounce instead of laboriously pushing wheels about! AND you get a proper bounce to get some height when you "shoot some hoops"!
Seems to ME that our paralympian athletes are more interested in Spaghetti Hoops that Shootin' Hoops, useless lot they are! Put 'em on Space Hoppers and let proper British talent shine!
I did notice that often they gets toppled over in wheelchairs, and land flat on their face. Rather than risk injury - simply put some lead shot in the base of the Space Hoppers! Hey Presto - Olympic Weebles that wobble but don't fall down!
See - health and safety benefits, a British Tradition, extra height to Dunk A Biscuit In The Tea (Space Hopping Basketball parlance for a "goal") - what could give us a better advantage?
I'm applying to help organise Rio, and see if I can sneak this event in!
Paralympian Space Hopper Basketball - why's no-one ever implemented this before?
What could possibly go wrong...
