Wheelchair basketball.
Christ, we're shit at it!
Watching Canada - BOOM! Slam dunk the funk! UK - lob it a bit and watch it bounce out.
So, I reckon TeamGB should stick to what they know.
In the city yesterday, I walked past [somewhere] and saw something in the window. All bedecked in Union Flag livery. And whilst watching some more wheelchair antics, that item crept into my bonce and stuck there. Something properly British.
Sod "Wheelchair" Basketball - what we need is...
...wait for it...
...you ready for this...
... pom Pom POMMMMMMMMMMM!...
SPACE HOPPER BASKETBALL!
After all, they's quite similar to wheelchairs. Except you have to bounce instead of laboriously pushing wheels about! AND you get a proper bounce to get some height when you "shoot some hoops"!
Seems to ME that our paralympian athletes are more interested in Spaghetti Hoops that Shootin' Hoops, useless lot they are! Put 'em on Space Hoppers and let proper British talent shine!
I did notice that often they gets toppled over in wheelchairs, and land flat on their face. Rather than risk injury - simply put some lead shot in the base of the Space Hoppers! Hey Presto - Olympic Weebles that wobble but don't fall down!
See - health and safety benefits, a British Tradition, extra height to Dunk A Biscuit In The Tea (Space Hopping Basketball parlance for a "goal") - what could give us a better advantage?
I'm applying to help organise Rio, and see if I can sneak this event in!
Paralympian Space Hopper Basketball - why's no-one ever implemented this before?
What could possibly go wrong...
