Didn't I warn them!
"Pray" I said!
"Destroy the Devil" I said!
...
"But they're not Devils... they're...
POD PEOPLE FROM THE PLANET MARS!!!"
It seems that them Time Team fellas filmed there in 2010, but uncovered a big fat nowt. Caistor St Edmund? Caistor St Edmund Blackadder, more like!
Anyhew, recent scans of the underground show a mysterious structure made up of two angled wings on a central structure. A lost scout ship from Outer Space, piloted by cannibalistic betentacled beasties looking for strange new worlds with nude civillizations, no less!
Time Team found nothing my best hat - Tony Robinson dug up a metamorphosing beastie with chomping pseudopods, and after cleaning all the mud of it, it woked up and turned Baldric into a imitation Fat Tulip, who is probably right now feasting on the flesh of nubile young student archæologistettes with their trews halfway down their ass with their crack exposed to the elements so Phil Hardon has a place to store his trowel.
And by trowel, I mean cock.
I say we lock up the Time Team and get Kurt Russell to do a blood test on 'em! I don't want to be overrun by alien clones of beardy earthdiggers hell bent on colonizing the Earth, biting people with their chests and bursting all nudie out of their clothes and shoving their dirty knickers in the kitchen trash can.
That said, if it's nubile young student archæologistettes nudily bursting out of their clothes and assaulting me with their chests, I'll up for a bit of death by orifice absorbtion!
¹ OR VENTA ICENORUM - THE MARKET OF THE ICENI PEOPLE. WHICH PROBABLY MEANS THAT THE ICENI WERE ALL DESCENDED FROM THEM SPACE MONSTERS UNDER THEIR FEET. THAT MEANS THE QUEEN OF ICENI DOWN RIVERSIDE (MOTHERFUCKER) IS THAT SPAWNING MONSTROSTITY THAT ELLEN RIPLEY DUFFED UP IN ALIENS. THEMS NOT CHAVS DOWN THERE - THEY BE HOSTS FOR THE FACEHUGGERS TO FACEFUCK AND PUT A SPACE MONSTER IN THEIR BELLY. TEEN PREGNANCY BY ALCOPOP, MY ARSE! IT'S BLOODY NOSTROMO BASED FELLATIO FERTILIZATION!
STONE ME - THE QUEEN OF ICENI IS THE MODERN EQUIVALENT OF ANCIENT SUMERIAN ARCTIC ZIGGURATS² - THEY'RE BREEDING³ AN ALIEN RACE FOR A PUNCH-UP BETWEEN THEM AND PREDATORS OUTSIDE MERCY AND ROCCO'S!
² ZIGGUR ZIG - AH! IF YOU WANNA BE MAH LOVAH, YA GOTTA BE UNDER AGE. ANTHEM OF SPICE GALS CAROLINE SLACK(TWAT) AND QUENTIN-TARANTULA.
³ "I AIN'T GOT TIME TO BREED"
"YOU GOT TIME TO FUCK?"
PEW-PEW! PEW-PEW!
"IT MUST BE FERTILE - IT'S BLOOD WAS ON THE LEAVES"
"IF IT BREEDS, WE CAN KILL IT!"
