I don't know!
Accidental path crossage and she be EVERYWHERE! And she mentioned to another Pretty that she saw the Xym on Escort Duties and got all Well Jel!
Pop in that shop - Spooky simulcra of the sexy siren!
Watch that tellyshow - oh, she looks like her!
Watch that filum - crickey, she's a dead ringer for her!
Stick a Blu-Ray on - feck me! It's HER! Literally, it's HER!!
Dammit - identikit clones of a Pretty all over the shop, and narry an obligatory nudie shower scene to ogle her brazenly bared norks in between 'em!
And I wouldn't mind being between 'em!
Not that I would, because it's HER.
And I DON'T fancy Her.
Do I?
No!
Wait a minute Xym... you fancy ALL the Pretties, you lecherous lump o'lard!
Oh yeah!
Doesn't mean I fancy Her, or anything.
So stop talking about Her then!
Was I? Was I really?
Nah.
I fancy YOU, my Prettiest Pretty² of all!
Lets go to Paris.
Disneyland, Paris, that is!
Or Alton Towers.
Or Pleasurewood Hills.
Fuck it - let's go see Jessie J up the showground.
Mwah, mwah, much love, hugs & snoggage.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
¹ NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH ANY SIMARLY SOUNDING EMMA OR KAYBABE - USED PURELY FOR ONOMATOPEIC PURPOSES ONLY - IE M-I-C-K-E-Y, AS IN MICKEY MOUSE!
² AND NOT THAT OTHER HAG-FACED TOAD-BITCH³. SHE DOESN'T EVEN HOLD A CANDLE TO YOU. AND IF SHE DID HOLD A CANDLE TO YOU, I'M NOT HAVING SOME SLAG TORCHING MY PRETTIES WITH WAXEN TALLOW, SO SHE'D GET A RIGHT SEEING TO. IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE.
³ NOT THE BABE WHO'S THE SUBJECT OF THIS MISSIVE. THE TROUT-FACED FISHWIFE THAT, IF YOU POINTED IT OUT IN A PHOTO AND ASKED IF IT WAS PRETTY AND I SAID YES, WOULD RIGHT ROYALLY PISS YOU OFF FOR FINDING 'THAT' ATTRACTIVE. DESPITE 'THAT' HOLDING A CANDLE TO MY NETHER-REGIONS AND FORCING ME UNDER TORTURE TO CLAIM THE TROLL WAS ONE HOT DAME.
