Some bloke posted a note on our discussion database today (entitled 'I'm off to East Harling') about the strange things what crop up on planning application websites, and pasted in one of the entries.
Now, what got him all excited is the fact that someone has applied to convert one of the units on the Cloverfield Industrial Estate into a licensed sex shop. Unfortunately, the planning office ain't one for withholding yer personal data, so now we all know the home address of this purveyor of porn! His house is called Bottrell - now we know his business, perhaps he should have named it ButtTroll!
Apparently, there's a secret sign to recognise a porn shop - it's got three big shiny balls over the door.
Clearly, someone isn't familiar with human anatomy, as though the shinyness can reflect reality through judicious use of razor and turtlewax, someone has miscalculated the number of lovespuds possessed my the average bloke. Unless, of course, the original model had a misshapen nob, in the shape of a third ballbag.
I don't think I'll join him on his pilgrimage to Harling though - I've heard tell of this here Cloverfield - great big sea beastie on the prowl, ripping the bonce off've statues in vengeance for its aquarian brethren being bunged into beverages! And a right old monster it is, presumably along the lines of the legendary monster 'King Dong' - although somehow I can't imagine being welcomed to Manhattan Island by some huge French tart with a book of justice and a Rampant Rabbit in her mitts.
Liberté, egalité, vibraté...
