Well, we managed to raise £261.54 on Friday for Children in Need.
That's enough to buy a needy child either a frost free under counter freezer, or 26,154 penny chews!
Although why they would want a GMTV Newsreader to come over and have her chew on you is beyond me! I guess sending that Fiona Phillips out there wasn't good enough.
Personally, I'd send 'em the freezer, coz they can sit in it and escape the arid African heat. Not only that, they can sell ice creams to their neighbours, and it's just damn lazyness if they can't flog a Funny Feet to a passing celebrity!
Celebrities indeed! I was round my chums last night, and we accidentally caught a glimpse of "HELP! I'm a celebrity...get me out of here NOW!". Surely, this has to be retitled...
"HELP! I was a celebrity (allegedly)...get my career revived NOW!"
This is because no-one knows who half these 'celebs' are! You got...
● Anton Dec presenting
● Anna "Ride Her!" Richardson
● Christopher Not-Quite-As-Biggins
● Kate The Strumpet off've The Apprentice
● That Chef off've Britains Best Dish
● Some singer from 5ive
● Some annoying old gits
● Some annoying young gits
● Some haggard American with a big gob
I'm a celeb - WHO'S the celeb, more like!
I wanna be in that jungle. Mainly so I'm forced to lose tons of weight.
And get a eyeful of Ride A Richard's sons norks. Mwah ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Oh, the comedy!
Will it ever start...
