Oh my!
Oh dear, more like!
I walk in this morning, and of the 5 hotties on the floor, Two were bent double side by side over the desk.
Right over.
One in a very tight black skirt, lacy tights and shiny high heels, t'other in tight blue trews1.
A brace of babes bent over, brazenly bearing their buttocks aloft, fabric stretched so tight you could probably count the dapples in their cellulite.
Right in my path.
And from there the hilarity arose.
Seems my Office Pretty got Wel Jel under the misapprehention I was ogling up Other Birds Arses, when I was just emptying my pockets.
Which isn't a euphamism for jizzing in me pants.
Looks like they mistook my divesting my pockets of coat of phones, ipods, snacks and stuff, afore finally removing my coat for: Xym suddenly stops in his tracks, transfixed by a pair of Pretties presenting their posteriors in his direction.
As if!
I'm so misunderstood me...
...but, I'm young(ish), [kinda] free and [sorta] single, so I'm allowed! Besides - I needs to get in as much lecherous leering as possible before I ends up with a Pretty of my very own2 which would certainly cease and curtail such comedic pervatorical peerings.
Still - I promised wel jel Office Pretty she'd get her turn. So I'd better make a special effort to pay attention to her tight top and tight trews, and go that extra mile in making it obvious I'm appreciating her tits 'n' bits.
Although I think I may be in the Bad Books for pointing out that ole Lacy Tights walks like a bloke, which spoils the effect somewhat. You'd think that women would thank me for slagging off other womens and making them feel more beautiful and superior - but no! The Xym can't do anything right, can I!
Probably because I walk like a right girl, apparently!
Which would explain all them gayboys hitting on me down The WhatACunt, and then gayboy/homophobes hitting me for no reason down The WhatACunt/UEA.
1 UNLIKE THE DRESS THAT WAS MORE VIRTUAL SKIN YESTERDAY! WOWSERS!!
2 DREAM ON, XYM! IT'S AN ETERNITY OF PERVING FOR YOU. NOBODY LOVES YOU! [gollum! gollum!]
