SOME people just can't keep their mouths shut!
Remember last week, when I ran afoul of Pretties by making them feel all beautiful by praising them over others, and it didn't go down too well?
Well, actually, she didn't go down at all.
or something.
Anyhoo. Last night, I'm with some Pretties, and for some reason ending up discussing the Prettyness of other pretties.
So, The Xym was honest, this time! Because last time I pandered to Pretties egos, they gots a strop on.
Thankfully not a strap on. Unless it's with one of the other Pretties in some Vagitarian banquet.
or something.
Anyhoo, one particular Pretty said something about something... oh, that was it!
We were talking about how peoples names get mixed up in me head, into some pervatorical similarity, eg Hell, I'd-Bone-Her Carter instead of Helena Bonham Carter.
Now, The Xym does like many a Pretty, and sometimes people don't understand how I like Her, or Her, or how I could possibly like Her when she's as ugly as!
Anyhoo, that's how we ended up discussing the attractiveness of nearby Pretties, and inadvertently mentioned a couple of Hot Hot Hot types, and one extremely steamy Hot Hot Hot mega Pretty.
And of course, my companion assessor decided to grass me up to the sexy siren!
Great. Yet another Pretty what's going to think I fancy the pants off her1, and avoid me like the plague whilst arranging further duffings up from boyfriends/husbands.
Come to think of it... you know how The Xym is often singled out for a threatening for no reason at clubs & gigs? I reckon thems yobbos are all boyfriends/husbands of babes who've been told that I'm ogling them up!
All becomes clear!
Well, I'm not telling no-one of my admirations no more! All I gets is double crossing trecherous betrayals of confidence!
Not that I actually fancy her2
or Her2
or even Her2
or even extremely steamy Hot Hot Hot mega Pretty3
but definately not Her, Her, Her or That4
2 HA! AS IF YOU DON'T, XYM! WHAT? DON'T "SHHHHHH" ME, YOU GREAT FAT OAF! YOU'RE LYING TO YOURSELF, YOU TART! FFS XYM - YOU'RE SINGLE, YOU'RE ALLOWED TO ADMIRE PRETTIES. YOU JUST HAVE TO STOP WHEN YOU GET ONE OF YOUR OWN!
2 OH, XYM, YOU LIAR!
3 GIVE IT UP, XYM, YOU LECHEROUS OAF!
4 URGH! OK, I'LL AGREE WITH YOU THERE, XYM!
