PLANTLIFE!!
A mourning suit can be avoided if you take a route directly away from PLANTLIFE!!
After a gloomy morning running two Haunted Houses in a row, followed by a healthy 'spoons meal, I though I'd attack the mean green mother from out of that space that has taken over me garden.
Audrey II has nothing on my herbiage!
Due to working muchly last year, I left my foliage to flounder after burning through a couple of hedgery trimmers!
Bad move!
Gardening! Them old folks are always at it! Nice, easy, stress-free activity, ideal for thems who (like me) are recovering from Heart Failure. Chippetty chop, snippity snap - job done!
Not so my Wisteria and Ivy! The bastard buds have taken over, and I really should have bought one of them there Machetés to chop though the jungle.
Didn't get very far, as the Triffids fought back!
Lashing out with thorny pseudopods of whipping stemmery! One particular git tried to have me eye out several times! No matter how many times the shears reduced its height, it insisted on rising up to batter me face repeatedly, intent on thorning me oculars out!!
My poor arms - gouged and scratched to buggery! Huge rents and wields all over me limbs, as if an Evil Dead rapey tree had been having a go at me!
Worst of all, due to blood-thinning meds, I bruise dead easy, and now my upper thigh is a red blotchy mess of broken blood vessels!
Damn you Christian Grey birch, whipping me in the nadgers with your springy thornyness!
