Well, what an eventful evening!
Surprise invite by mah Polish Pretty for drinkage at 7! Home, shower, bus... arrive... no pretty :(
Textage! I see you! Eh, whut? Ah, I be spied upon by office Pretty, who is Preggo on Tombland.
Phone call! Ah, my Pretty called someone else, asking that I call the Pretty back on the withheld number. A bit difficult, as the number is withheld, ergo I cannot call it!
But hoorah! Pretty walks through the door!
So, me, mah Pretty, and Pretty's husband are having a drink and a chat, when here approacheth inebriated Chav Scum. Tossing aside my bottle cap (leaving my Jaques open to spillage and defizzification), he loitered, banging his glass about, challenging arm wrestles, being loud obnoxious and a general cunt.
But, no way! His mates are joining up! Lisa Tarbuck pissed as fuck, rattling on about shite and upsetting mah Pretty with talk of pregnancy within a year. His other mate, highly apologetic for his intoxicated embarassing bodies.
And so, whilst distracted by more booze, we made our excuses and left.
But it's earleh, and the Pretty has to return to let her pussy out (as she had kidnapping a Tom with a big dick).
So, on to another pub and other chums for Mod night in a cellar. A mod night that lacked for both Mod music and Pretties (with 4 notable exceptions).
And then on down to The Whatacunt for Britpoppin', and much hoikage of The Tights¹.
Much quaffage and more Pretties. Pretties I should not be thinking of as Pretties. Erotic Pretties I should stay well clear of. Pretties I do not know, but would like to!
Much dancing - but no tears in my eyes, but there were in eyes of an extremely hot Pretty! A Pretty that voluntarily sat beside me on the sofa! A Pretty all weepy of eye, nestled into the crook of my arm. Alas, however, a Pretty robbed by drink of the ability to speak.
We eventually got something about "creepy man", and where did one of my other Pretties live (presumably to share a taxi home?) but could only give her address as Norwich.
Then she ran off and started gyrating on some other bloke instead of me.
So no change there then!
And then I puts me foot in it. Accompany my remaining 2 regular Pretties to the Taxi to ensure they get off safe. taxi comes, see them getting in, taxi leaves, one's still walking! Well, I'm not having that! Chivalrous Xym will get you a taxi! I'll even pay! No, she wants to walk. OK, I shall escort you back safely.
Oooh, there's that bloke you had your eye on. He also lives near(ish) you. You can walk back with him! No, he's a stranger. Stay with me! Oh, we've caught up to the stranger. He seems OK. They get on well. Xym may not as well be there! Gets 98% of the way back, and I leaves them at the top near her street, and decide to continue on my way home, whilst he takes her the rest of the way.
Panic! Should I have let them go off alone? Was it more chivalrous to leave at that point, in case they were enamoured of each other and "wanted to be alone", or should I have escorted right to the door rather then let her go down the dark with a stranger?
One hopes one has not allowed A Bad Situation to occur.
Fuck I'm useless!
Perhaps Xym's Escort Agency Of Chivalry needs to be abandoned...
¹ NOT WORN BY THE XYM, BY THE WAY!
