And they can't even arrest me for it, coz swearing at cops is no longer against the law!
Apparently, the OCP budget has been drastically reduced under Austerity Measures, and Murphy has been relegated from armoured car to a pushbike!
Dead or alive - you're coming with me - on my bike!
And, typically, Robocop got knocked off his bike, and ended up in a critical, yet stable, position in a Nottinghamshire Hospickle.
Now, It's a while since I watched Robocop in action. As I recall, it took a battering from an ED209, or a pummelling from Cain Dingle in a supersuit, or choppage with a cordless power saw by teenage druglords as Officer Duffy Rained On His Parade by showing no Mercy on Warwick Avenue by torturing him with his gravelly voiced rendition of "Stepping Stone".
Whist riding a bike and taking coke. Or drinking coke. Or was that Patrick Duffy? Or Duffy In The Buff Slaying Vampires?
Summat like that, anyways!
Not taking a tumble from a bicycle.
However, this Robocop doesn't actually appear to be any kind of cyborgian construct suffering from Directive IV syndrome. In fact, he appears to be a bog standard bobby on a bike.
And not even the village one!
Curiously, though, in scouring the area for 'evidence' of the bloke what bumped him off his bike, the human police are visiting mechanics and scrap metal merchants. A-ha! Looks like Cyberdyne Systems Model 101 has already been created - Robocop in name, Terminator on the outside! Hence the hunt for spare parts in the junkyards!
Will that pesky Sherrif of Knotting 'em stop at nothing to catch that Maid Marion I'the Nudd (as she's high on Sherwood sherbert dogging in the forest with Robin I'the Hoddie, Try-a-fuck, 'Big' Ron and Alan-a-Dalewinton - the latter after Much scarlet willies, red raw from woodland shaggage)?
UNLESS...
He's already called Robocop... but he doesn't know it! because Bob Morten has only told him he'll be OK. In reality, he's expecting an agreement on total body prosthesis, so a new Mythbusters¹ style Robosuit can be grafted on. In fact, he was probably run over by Dick Jones in the first place!
"I had to kill Mansfield South PC Diederik Coetzee because he made a mistake. Now it's time to erase that mistake. Ooooh - Kari Byron in a binkinini - I'd buy that for a dollar!"
¹ MITH BYRON'TH BUTHT, THAT ITH (HE THAYTS, LITHPING!)
