Very well, my dear, I shall do too!
Just state your plans and the venue
"I'l let you know/get back to you!"
"Oh Xym, Oh Xym, Oh where was thee?
We missed you out on Saturdee!"
Why, I was lain on the settee
forlornly awaiting txts from thee
All spruced up and out the tub
With no word of pub nor club
Just a txt to say "You're dumped!"
And I ain't pulled, so now I'm stumped!
So I assume The Xym's not wanted
For locations hath not been imparted
No Xym to get the Party started
And leave his Pretties broken-hearted1?
"Oh Xym, Oh Xym, where was thee Mon2
We know you must weigh half a ton
But surely you could waddle on
down to t'pub where Fest is on?"
What be this fest of what thou speak?
For mine psychic powers e'en at their peak
cannot delve into thine mind and peek
at this fest of which thou speak!
"The one just down the road from you
We just forgot to invite you...
Because, of course, we thought you knew!
And that's the tale we're sticking to!"
Seems everyone was there but me3
Partaking of a pint or three
Happy that they're finally free
of that bastard Xym-on-ee!
and think him all unwelcomin'
because you did not invite him in
and therefore he was totally unaware of it until people started banging on about why he was being such an unsociable miserable sod for not turning up at things he was expected to be at, despite not being given any details. Or being invited. Or even made aware that he should be at the aforementioned Eventage. Or that there was even Eventage on in the first place!
1 WELL, LESS BROKEN-HEARTED AND MORE IN A CELEBRATORY FIESTA AT THE LACK OF THE LECHEROUS LARDARSE LEERING AT LADIES AND GENERALLY POLLUTING THE ATMOS WITH HIS PRESENCE.
2 MONDAY. NOT MON AS IN RASTA, YEAH'MON.
3 APART FROM THEM WHAT WEREN'T!
