Sometimes I am at a loss to understand how some things can actually happen.
Back in 1993, there was this bloke who got jailed for having sex with pavements. Now, this should bring a strange image into your head, as you try and figure out how someone can bonk pedestrianised areas.
Apparently, it consists of finding large enough cracks or apertures - failing that, lying on the slabs and rubbing against them.
However, last October, some bloke in Scotland got 3 months for shagging a bike in a hostel. He was caught by a couple of female cleaners, clad only in a T-shirt, holding the bike and rogering it.
Here I'm at a loss!
How on Earth can you be holding a bike and giving it one at the same time - and where?. I can only think he's using the spokes of the wheel, but surely that'd tear his cock to ribbons! And how do you get around your pubes being entangles in the chain and sprocket* - not to mention the pedals getting in the way!
I've had friends who play rugby, and I've heard about what they all get up to post match (not to mention during!). One dreads to think what them Tour De France lot get up to.
And France is reknown for being all romantic and shit.
Mon Dieu! Look at the size of his Chopper! Les BMX bum bandit is taking it up the seat! Let all get mounting the Mountain Bike!
Hey, that's a nice bike...
Nice forks...
So nice in Nice...
* A SPROCKET BEING A FORM OF COGWHEEL. NOT THE NOW LEGENDARY DOG THAT HANGS AROUNG WITH MISTER MCKAY EATING PORRIDGE.
