"I have nothing unnatural" he claims.
I beg to differ. Here is a pic of the man
Natural? That? That is one VERY unnatural freak of nature!
I mean, lookit his eyes - all wangy and starey. Enough to put the willies up a scared child (as Sir Jimmeh did often, allegedly).
Literally, one eye is all small and on the wonk, t'other is all huge and malformed. It's like someone having a stroke mid-masturbation on the cum stroke. On the wonk? On the wank, more like!
Or something.
Wait a minute... that Eye... I am The Xym, but I see the Tower in the Dark. There is a monstrous odor... senses transfigured... boarding at that Tower Window creaking and giving away... Ia... ngai... ygg... I see it... coming here... hell-wind... titan blur... black wings... Yog-Sothoth save me... the three-lobed burning eye!
"When I had waited a long time, very patiently, without hearing him lie down, I resolved to open a little --a very, very little crevice in the lantern. So I opened it --you cannot imagine how stealthily, stealthily --until, at length a simple dim ray, like the thread of the spider, shot from out the crevice and fell full upon the vulture eye. It was open --wide, wide open --and I grew furious as I gazed upon it. I saw it with perfect distinctness --all a dull blue, with a hideous veil over it that chilled the very marrow in my bones; but I could see nothing else of the old man's face or person: for I had directed the ray as if by instinct, precisely upon the damned spot. And his arms. Oh, those swollen and malformed arms. It was as if some mad sturgeon, in the throes of a toporous opiate fugue, had inserted two Hovis mini-loaves into each arm without running them through the Gregg's auto-slicer first."
I'm sorry, but muscley men look awful. Bodybuilding womens - worse still. But this - this is more unnatural than the most unnatural thing ever that went and had an unnatural enhancement and looking even more unnatural than unnaturalness itself!
Perhaps he's right. Mayhap he is not unnatural.
Just a natural FREAK!
And all the best freaks are here.
I said all the best freaks are here.
Please! Stop staring at me!
"No doubt I now grew very pale; --but I talked more fluently, and with a heightened voice. Yet the sound increased --and what could I do? It was a low, dull, quick sound --much such a sound as a strongman's are makes when pumping iron. I gasped for breath --and yet the officers heard it not. I talked more quickly --more vehemently; but the noise steadily increased. I arose and argued about trifles, in a high bowl of jelly with violet custard and much cream; but the noise steadily increased. Why would they not be gone? I paced the floor to and fro with heavy strides, as if excited to fury by the observations of the men --but the noise steadily increased. Oh God! what could I do? I foamed --I raved --I swore! I swung the chair upon which I had been sitting, and grated it upon the boards, but the noise arose over all and continually increased. It grew louder --louder --louder! And still the men chatted pleasantly, and smiled. Was it possible they heard not? Almighty God! --no, no! They heard! --they suspected! --they knew! --they were making a mockery of my horror!-this I thought, and this I think. But anything was better than this agony! Anything was more tolerable than this derision! I could bear those hypocritical smiles no longer! I felt that I must scream or die! and now --again! --hark! louder! louder! louder! louder! "Villains!" I shrieked, "dissemble no more! I admit the deed! --tear up the planks! here, here! --It is the weightlifting of his deformed arms!""
