Honestly, these automobiles suck cash wose than vampires on a virgins neck!
My brum failed the MOT cos it needed a new bush. Now, what exactly a bush is going in my engine, or why there needs to be one there to make it run is beyond me!
Perhaps they're sneaking in all these green environmental (emphasis on MENTAL) measures by running transportation off've life giving oxegenating plantlife.
It's well known that you can power a space rocket on a hamster in a treadmill, a nail in a ping pong ball and some small screws, but trimmed hedgerows powering the engine? Perhaps they're the long lost Entsprog, turning cogs and pistons with their trendril like branches.
And how come it ends up so expensive, all you have to do is pop into Catton Forest and shoplift some shrubbery - cheaper than spending piles of cash on a sapling at B&Q wot dies in about three days.
Shame really, coz when they rang up and said they'd got me a new bush, I suspected they'd found out my birthday's coming up, and got me a bush in the nubile Spearmint Advocaat trollop 'Happy Birthday Big Boy' in the back room type sense.
And not with the bouncer with the greased up arm and the gimp mask!
Oh well, look like I've enough left to treat meself to a McDonalds* Birthday Fillet o'Fish...
...as in nubile young student fillie and associated fishlike connoctations.
Or something!
* LOOKS LIKE IT'LL HAVE TO BE! ALL MY PARTY PLANS HAVE BEEN UNINTENTIONALLY SCUPPERED BY PEOPLE DOING THEM IN ADVANCE, SO THEY AIN'T GONNA GO AGAIN SO SOON.
THINK I'LL STAY IN AND GUZZLE EGG IN SOUP (WITH PORK PIE SIDE DISH) INSTEAD!
