Typically, the dumpstation aboard the spacestation broke'd down, so now there's a whole bunch of astronauts floating with floaters in zero-gravity cesspits, awaiting a plumber with a new pump.
Now, it's bad enough trying to get a plumber round on our own planet, let alone in elliptical planetary orbit !
"Clearly having a working toilet is a priority for us," said Scott Higginbotham of NASA. - Higginbotham? Surely a missprint, and should be Mingingbottom after a weeks worth of excretory excess with nowhere to go!
One would assume, though, that with nowhere to void their bowels, they must go on some spacewalk, drop their spacesuit bottoms and launch their golden rapiers into the atmosfear. Shooting stars of shite shine in the skies as turds tumble from the heavens.
UFOs (Unidentified Fecal Objects) splatter the windscreen of visiting Venusian afterburner vehicles as they traverse between the spheres, prohibiting the view and making them crash down in Nevada deserts, where the Space Beasties have to blend in by donning Elvis costumes and pretending to be Nicholas Cage.
Take my love, take my land
take me where I cannot stand
I don't care, I'm still free
you can't take the sky from me
take me out, to the black
perhaps there I can do a cack
burn* my turds, and boil my pee
you can't take the sky from me
There's no place for faeces
since we broke our lava-t'ry
you can't take the sky from me
But they can nick your toilet roll...
* STRANGE THING ABOUT THE WORD BURN - IN ITALICS IT LOOKS LIKE BUM. AND IF THEM ASTRONUTS ARE BUMMING THE TURDS, THERE'S DEFO SOMETHING WRONG WITH THE SCIENTIFIC COMMUNITY. STILL, AT LEAST THEY HAVE THEIR BEARDS OF GREY HUE IN CASE OF THERE'S A LACK OF BOTTY WIPING PUPPIES ABOUT...
