They're a funny old lot, them greeks.
I reckon it all stems from Pliny and them other philosophers, thems what all talk absolute arse.
But it's not all anal obsessions, oh no! There be shlong slicery too!
With Bollywood porn on the eateries tellybox, converse turns from talk of spicy food to spicing up the loins, and them greek orthodox jewboys have some very unorthadox practices.
I've heard tell of a Bar Mitzvah. Now, them linguistical types will have it that the phase "Bar Mitzvah" is Hewbrew for "Son of the Commandment" or some such. Bollocks. I have it on authority that it's jewgreek for "Bar Of Chocolate".
Fry's Turkish Delight, to be specific.
And I don't mean Stephen's oiled up eunuch from the fleshpits of Instanbul for the sodomic sexual shennanigans .
Apparently, when a man becomes a man at age 13 and it's time to remove his helmet, a Mohel fills the young lad's gob full of the rosey jellified treat. The perfumed savouryness of the confection is enough to send his coming-of-age endorphins flowing, and thus the young man fails to notice his cocktip being ripped off.
Probably by the Mohel's teeth, like some Mohel Jackson pædo priest plying children with red-centred-Jesus-Juice choccie to get at their cock!
I reckon them pervy ole greeks got it all mixed up. I reckon that Turkish Delight is shovelled into your cakehole to prevent scurvy when circumnavigating the globe. No one wants to suck on sour limes when pirating on the high seas, but a chocolatey rose flavoured gelatenous product is a much more preferable treatery for the nom-nom-nomming thereof.
And women in desert tents have their red centered delight split by hunky Lawrence-Llewellin-Bowens of Aribia with their oversized sword.
The Sheiks also use their muhaddab scimitar to slice the hareem's chocolate bars in half too!
