Ooooh, thought The Xym, one of the Local takeaways is doing Nepalese grubs!
"Oh, here we go! Another round of so-called humourous deliberate misinterpretations about jugs and nipple-ease cuisine" [readers voice]
Au contraire, dear Reader! How little you know me!
Anyhew, I've heard of Nepal,and I was hoping for something different. A Yak's sack saag? A shank of Sherpa in a spicy sauce? A Tikka Tibetean marinaded in meditative madras? Curried kebabs made from chillied Yeti cocks with a lotus flower raita.
No such exotic viands to sample. Bog standard Chicken Lazis, which is probably Tibetean for Chickens with laser eyes. or something,
So I gave it a whirl. Fairly hot, it said. Well, maybe it is if you're sat in naught but a burnt orange saffron robe on a snow laden icy glacier! Mild as mild as mild can be!
On the downside, I know know why them there bell fingered Tripitaka types wear orange clothes.
It's because they keep spilling their tea all over themselves!
Just tipping the poultry dish onto a plate, and my hands and nails were stained an oranger shade of Oompa-Loompa, so imagine if I was sat there in a flimsy white smock, trying to eat a Buddhist Balti whilst precariously balancing a plate on me knee as I stuff me face between chants of Om Mani Padmé Skywalker and dripping Jalfrezi all over me djabelly and smearing my greasy orangey fingers all over it!
Them gee-whore-dy Shore, TOWIE, Valley facial tans? They've just been motorboarding bowls of murgh masaala for that golden hue about their chops!
On the plus side - I could fling it all over the kitchen walls. Not only get a nice terracotta effect, but It'll small all nice and Himalayan kitcheny.
Mmmmmm Himalayan kitcheny... Roasted Sasquatch scrotums & BBQ Bigfoot feets...
