That there news did some repotage today, and it appears that a whole battalion of soldiering types is lobbed out of the forces every year coz they're all high on Certain Substances!
No wonder us poor civvies can' get over our headaches - there's no medicinal tablets available coz the Para's eat 'em all!
Para's eat 'em all... Paracetemol...
No?
Well, please yerself then!
It's a laugh a minute on my blog.
Or, more likely, a minute laugh, although what my newt has to do with it, I'll never know. Scrabbling about through air ducts and screeching like it were that Dakota Fannyingabout. Timmeeeeee. Ripleeeeee. EeeeeeEEEeeEEeeeEE! Grrrrrr - smack that brat! Wallop, wallop, wallop. On the head.
Anyhoo, there's also a 'growing trend' for people to use homeopathic remedies, which is modern speak for old wives tales and bitches brews. Wiping your bum with a dockleaf, instead of Anusol for piles, for example.
Now, what these hippy types seem to forget that when these olde worlde homepaths were the norm, live expectancy was about 27, so we can probably expect Kurt Cobain, Jimi Hendrix, and Jim Morissey to be big fans. They may have been more at the hallucinatory end of the pharmaceutical flora, but an apple a day make you sick of the sight of apples after a week.
Talking of Morrisons - there's that bloody annying Xmas ad at the moment. "I want my tarts hot, steaming, and with a dash of my cream inside" and suchlike. But what REALLY gets my goat is that haggard old trout that demands "Turkey, wrapped in bacon". Now, she may be some inconsequential celeb I've never seen or heard of before, but if she reckons that's a turkey wrapped in bacon, she needs her ancient old catarats rebooting!
Look at what the Morrison chef's present as the feast in question. A huge bird (not the heifer holding it) with TWO measly very thin strips of bacon draped on top. To me, that's not wrapped in bacon, that's just plonking a bit on top to try and look all poncey!
Tell you wot missus, I'll get you Wii for Xmas, and wrap it by placing 2 soiled squares of arsewipe on top. You'll never guess wot it is under all that wrapping! In return, you could wrap me up that Sarah from the Curry's ad, in a couple o' bits of string and 2 thimbles.
Roly-Mo and Rockit!
Oh, will the joyous comedy never cease?!?!?!
(did it ever start...?)
