Clearly the aroma of Dogturd Poo and the TURDIS are in my imagination, and the evil reek comes from me!
There I was, lying in The Chair, and the Scrivello sez I need to see a hygienist! Wots wrong with me hygiene? Am I such a loathsome, foul smelling, filthy hobo that's only concept of a shower is being rained on? How dare he accuse me of wallowing in dirt, like some skanky ho with the perfumery of a tarts handbag filled to brimming with the contents of her soiled knicker drawer!
Oh, It's me wonky teeth he got a problem with! And he's such a lazy arse, he can't do as good job as The Hygienist (or rake in as much dosh).
it's all coz me front bottom teeth (Fnarr Fnarr! Sounds painful missus!) tilt backwards, I've got a plaque on the baque, and he said I have a touch of the Gingivitus. Now, poor ole Jess got that, and he ended up with only 2 tooths, but if I lose all mine, at least I'll get wodges of cash!
So now I have to suck on Corsodyl. Cor, sod it! more like! I can hardly wait to swill me gob out with that stuff. Mmmmm minty fresh!
And I still have to see a hygienist.
If you wanna clean your teeth
Baby there's a price to pay (TWENTY QUIDS!)
A hygienist with a bottle
I got to "rub her" "the right way"
If you know what I mean (and I'm sure that you do)! So, if there's any ladies out there that wanna let me practice at rubbing them the right way...
Mwah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
