Nurofen aren't headache tablets after all! They're anti-loony pills!
It would appear that someone has discovered that far from removing that headachey feeling and pre-minstrel¹ tension, it's actually suppressing schizophrenia, mania and bi-polar depression.
This is apparently a bad thing.
Now, I'm not one to shout CONSPIRACY! but this has the faint air biscuit tang of a freshly blasted dutch oven escaping the coverlet through a small overlooked crevice.
This is clearly a cover-story after being caught out supressing The Mentals from slicing us up in our beds, raping our dead mouths and burning our bottoms to hide the evidence before popping round to Gazzas for a roast chicken and a can of lager.
I, for one, praise the manufacturers of the Ibuprovenguilty & Convict dual action tablets. If it weren't for them sneakily dosing sociopaths and serial killers with slaughterous suppressants in the guise of headache tablets to clear away the
And Stephen Fry would keep running off to Belgium, and we wouldn't get any more QI.
Apart from on Dave.
Don't bow to pressure, Mr Pharmacist. Keeps these murderous tendancies at bay by doping up these maniacal mad(wo)men when they get the
During them Londinium & ManChestHair riots, did they loot up any Nurofen? No! I blame that Whorelicksdick medicine - if people had been passively suppressed by headache tablets instead of trepanning their bonces and sticking needles up their bum in the name of acupuncture, it would never have happened!
Packaging "mix-up" my best hat! Next, The
Sent to Cygnus Alpha on trumped up charges of pædophilia, that's where!
¹ BEFORE CHOCOLATE. THEM WOMENS GET REALLY ARSEY IF THEY DON'T GET CHOCOLATE, AND A PACKET OF THE HARD COCOA SHELL BASED TREATERY GOES DOWN A... WELL, TREAT, REALLY, AND CALMS THEM RIGHT DOWN INTO ORGASMIC EUPHORIC BLISS.
