First, Harry beats him in the Tri-Wizard tournament, then Lord Fol-De-Rol zaps him when he clutches the Portaloo.
And he returns as one of The Undead. Wamphyri! Das Wampir! A vampire!!
Anyhoo - Cedric's a modern vampire.Which means...
a) He doesn't bite people or vampirise them
b) He sulks a lot and gives lots of looks at ladies
c) He can walk about in the daytime... but if he gets caught in sunlight then... the sun sparkles on his spray on glitter from Claires Accessories
d) He has a reflection
e) He lives in a great big house with his vampire family... all huge picture windows to let in lots of light
f) He can't transform into a bat, but he can run unbelievably quickly. Or rather, run somewhat unbelievably
g) He teaches damsels to dance by taking them up a tree and having a bit of a chat.
So, technically, apart from being 'immortal', he's not really a vampire at all!
Vegitarian vampires my bum! He's just (badly) put on a load of white foundation and act all mournful to pull pretties!
"Ooooh, I'm a tortured soul. I want to be with you, but I dare not, for I'm a Vampire me, and oh, so tragically alone"
"Swoon! Please make me a vampire, and I can be with you always!"
"Erm... no. Not because I'm not really a vampire, but... erm... I don't want to you be like me, all tragedy laden and miserable"
"But I WANT to be all EMO misery!"
"Feck. Why can't be grow old together"
"But you'll always remain as a 17 year old"
"Oh, the suffering I must endure, to watch you grow old, wither and die, whilst I remain ever so youthful"
"Swoony swoon swoon! It's true love!"
And just how did the mesmerised maiden work out that the unvampire-like vampire was a vampire? Good old google. Seems that googling Indian Legends returns the legend of the slapping beaver... Now, exactly how slapping beaver can make you realise the object of your desire is one of the undead, I'm not entirely sure.
Although, she was getting a bit frustrated, as she so wanted him to bite her and roger her senseless, but he declined in case he ripped her bonce off and feasted on her bodily fluids mid-bonk. Mayhap she got this legend as a mismatched hit whist asking 118-118 for advice on how to get a vampire to slap her beaver.
As you do...
