In my ever expanding role of Guru, pilgrims seeking enlightenment are once again questing for knowledge.
Todays font of wisdom concerns the naming of children and pregnant fishies.
It seems that some are concerned that it's perfectly acceptable to name a spawining Goldfish by way of Twit, or Prat, and yet this moniker is not applied to the general human populace.
Of course, this isn't true, for I personally have named a heck of a lot of people as pratts. Not to mention twits. Or just complete fuckwits.
Anyhoo, Pratt and Twitt are accepted surnames, so it begs the question: When you name a fishie, are you giving it a surname only? And why is it only pregnant fish that get called Prat or Twit?
Coz they're a prat or a twit for not using contraception in the first place!
Mind you, they've only got a memory of about 3 seconds, which in effect is inbuilt Rhohypnol. So there's all these club 18-30 types nobbing about, and having no memory of it!! BUT... if a fish only has a 3 second memory, surely once mummy fishie has told them about the Prawns and the Whelks, they've forgotten how to have sex. BUT... surely mum wouldn't remember that she'd even had sex, let along pass on the knowledge, having forgotten 3 seconds after the event.
And if none of them remember how to do the dirty deed, then they would be unable to reproduce. And if they forgot how to reproduce, then there can't be any naturally born.
Proof enough, I think, that golfdish are not fish at all, but the evil hybrid offspring of those Carny types, which explains why they only come in plastic bags after winning on the Hook A Duck game.
And if they've got Hooker Ducks on the game, then it's no wonder they give birth to these mentally retarded orangey floaters with no retentive memory that die when you get them home. Probably because they're taken out of the 'oxygen tent' that they came in.
And if they've cum in the oxygen tent, I ain't cleaning out the tank...
