The reason I believe this, is that whilst giving the bush a good trimming and mowing the lawn (2 euphemisms for the price of one!), I noticed a preponderance of plant pot reproduction.
Yes, it seems like some beige plant pots have snuck into the garden, and begun to spawn (although curiously, there was one lone black pot , so inter-racial nobbing is the order of the day).
Now, there are those that would think that these plant pots may have been blown into the garden, rather than blown off in the garden (and if they’ve been blowing off, it explains the stench of catch it). However, this is not a possibility due to the towering fortress of foliage and fencing.
Which explains the foil in the garden.
Not to mention the shady character who’ll "take it off yer ’ands guv’nor". He’s a cool cat, and no mistake...
...not like them felines that are fouling the flowers and bonking in the borders. It’s like The Birds, but with pussies instead of avian types. I goes out to get the scythe machine, and there’s a batallion of Bagpii - on roofs, on fences, in trees and bushes... and they all freeze and fix you with a steely glare.
Which is a shame, coz seeing as they’re headlining the Theatre Royal shortly, they could have at least done a floor show of Magical Mister Mistoffelees (who can’t bloody spell his name right), or MyCavity the orthodontal cat.
Not to mention Mungo Jerry and Rump Hole Teaser, giving the Rum Tum Tugger something to tug about in the summertime - an invite to his Jelly Filled Balls, if you wish.
I still think Lloyd-Webbed-Finger should have put in a neutering scene - Brian Blessed wouldn’t be half as shouty now!
The naming of cats is a serious matter....
...like "Gerroffoutoityershittingbastard"
An’ suchlike.
Midnight
Not a sound from the pavement
Apart from a pussy on heat
Screeching into the night
And knocking over the bins
BASTARD!
