I wonder what Harry & Will would have to do, if they brought in this ludicrous idea of pledging loyalty when they turn 16:
"I pledge allegiance to me gran, but my dad sez I shouldn’t coz I should show allegiance to him, and push her down the stairs so he can reign over England (unlike me mam, who threw herself down the stairs so she had a flimsy excuse to spend more time in bed, being the Queen of Tarts and nobbing blokes left, right and centre, them moaning coz Dad nobbed only one trollop)".
Pledge of allegiance, my arse! It’s all very well for them public school types, all ra ra ra, grass on one’s wicket - better get one’s Fag to give it a good polishing, daddy bought one a Portia (a higher class of Escort), AND one drinks champers strained through Jodpuhrs as one watches the hired help lift her skirts and get rogered by the pony as The Lady of the house gets rogered by the Gardener. Stand to attention while the National Anthem’s played, and sing along to Land of Hope & Glory, waving one’s flag at The Proms. God save the Queen, and long may she reign over The Empire, and put Johnny Foreigner in his place, serving up the Tiffin, what-ho.
But what about the Chavscum PigBotherer NudeTube generation? 4st 2 plej aleguns wen der all: Abolosh d monaki, coz der all ovapaid, ovaprivligd gits wot on hols all d time. All dey do is wach opra an’ ponci music an eat caviar n samon. Britin 1ts a president, like wot dey av in USA, coz Bush, is like, ded cleva, like us, yeh. Let’s c d Queen try an liv off benefits, bet she cunt manage 2 bi a PSP, PS3, X-Box, Mobies 4 all d family, HD teli wiv cabl AND nappies 4 my 9yr old dortas baby (Like, I’m so proud, it’s, like, all she eva 1ted). Stik yer Queen, and I’ll plej alegance to Ant and Dec.
Apparently, you have to pledge allegiance if you’re a Cub Scout (or a Guide with a Browneye & Beaver. Or something).
I’ll swear allegiance - Alle-fucking-giance.
Prahper jahhhhhb!
