Warn her, Picard! Warn her that... oh, not him again...

There has to be some Hollywood cloning facility going on, and it’s got stuck on David Warner!

Like the impossibly prolific Stephen King with the fountain pen grafted onto his finger, I’m being televisually stalked by The Warner sans Bros.

Everything I seem to watch recently has him in it! It’s like some TV bigwig must have a contract that sez David Warner must appear at some point!

• Titanic
• Time Bandits
• Tron
• Hogfather
• BBCs Sweeney Todd
• Babylon Five

and I gets me Tweaks, and who crops up as Eckhart - only he bloody well does!

I was about to order the Sapphire and Steel audio adventures and who’s Steel - only David Bloody Warner!

And today my dramatisation of The Brightonomicon arrived in the post... three guesses who’s Hugo Rune?

Him again!

Even Myleene Klass ain’t on as much TV as he is!